The CIA Is De-Woke-ifying Itself

We’ve excellent news for all you freedom-loving patriots on the market: our lengthy nationwide nightmare is over, the woke thoughts virus is dying, and the Central Intelligence Company will now not undergo underneath the yoke of oppressive variety, fairness, and inclusion coaching movies. In brief: Trump is saving our nation!

Sure, the CIA is planning its largest “mass firing” in over 50 years, in line with the New York Times, and people expulsions are largely focused at officers who work on “recruiting and variety points.” The newspaper notes that “51 officers working in variety and recruiting” are at present having their positions “reviewed,” although it’s unclear whether or not the terminations will truly happen. The positions in query seem to have been transformed from abroad agent recruitment roles into home DEI recruitment roles throughout the Biden administration, in line with statements from sources interviewed by the paper. If the officers are fired it will be “one of many largest mass firings within the company’s historical past,” the Instances writes.

The Trump administration is at present making an attempt to close down variety packages throughout the federal authorities, and so the Company’s efforts to intestine its DEI actions monitor with that total mission.

I’m, after all, joking after I say that Trump is de-woke-ifying the CIA. The actual joke is that the CIA—a brutal, secretive group chargeable for homicide and chaos all around the globe—was ever notably “woke” to start with.

It’s true that the company did launch that dopey recruitment video a few years again. You most likely keep in mind the one I’m speaking about. Sure, that video was really something, and featured its speaker—an obvious profession CIA lady—saying chortle-inducing stuff like: “I’m a cisgender millennial, who has been recognized with generalized anxiousness dysfunction,” and “I’m intersectional, however my existence shouldn’t be a box-checking train,” whereas additionally referencing her love of Zora Neale Hurston and her means to alter diapers.

I’d’ve liked to have seen a follow-up video discussing the intersectional complexities of this bomb that the company has used, the likes of which is roofed with knives and is designed to “slice and dice” its victims into viscera-dripping smithereens. What would Zora Neale Hurston have needed to say about that??

Anyway, sure, the video was ridiculous—however virtually suspiciously so. Certainly, its overt lunacy made me query whether or not it was actually an effort to recruit various hires or was, if truth be told, meant to piss off and radicalize midwestern MAGA varieties, a lot of whom inevitably felt the video was a surefire signal that their nation was being overtaken by HR workers from the nation’s most annoying liberal arts schools. After all, we’ll most likely by no means know why they did it, for the reason that CIA hardly ever says something about itself and, when it does, it often lies.

If the CIA briefly flirted with DEI optics, information tales in regards to the company’s precise staffing composition and conduct reveal that it’s something however “woke.” An internal study shared publicly in 2015 confirmed that near 90 p.c of the company’s high ranks have been white dudes. And, apart from all of the homicide and chaos, these white dudes apparently stand up to no good with relative frequency. This previous October, the Company was besmirched by stories of a “deep-rooted cultural drawback” involving sexual assault and harassment at the agency.